1. i had a spectacularly vivid dream last night that was crazy, non-stop, and the type of dream i would miss having if i ever stopped being able to. i don't remember half the details anymore, only that it involved my friends, living in a fab apartment in new york, eating out in garden cafes in the summer, and being crazy putting on makeup getting ready to go out - and then transformed into bunking with 2ne1 and seeing gd. at one point i was riding in the backseat of a car passed out next to him and dara, and i was curled up around him with gd looking like he did in beautiful hangover. it felt so real, hhahaha! and then i was with my family, and i think some of the boulder kids were in it too..... basically everybody i have ever known in my life (or hope to know) was in the dream and it was amazing and incredibleeeee.

2. i miss my best friends already, especially after last night's odd talk in the parking lot of starbucks as we tried prolonging the time we would all have before we would leave each other. it dragged on to period vag bags, skype dates, boys, uteruses falling out, an old biology teacher of ours, and plans for new york in the spring, and then we commenced to camerawhore. there is a hilarious picture of the three of them lined up in a row that i accidentally took while trying to figure out the self-timer on my camera; i am not in the frame except for the edge of my elbow, and claire, daren, and alex are making three variations (snort-inducing variations) on the same stereotypical fobby face i taught them. looking at it gives me a surge of affection, love, and general warm-fuzziness towards them and how did i EVER find three people who understand me this well? i can't wait to spend the rest of our lives together. soulmates. ♥

3. i stumbled upon an old christmas sock on my dresser a few hours ago and pulled out the gift inside - a tiny clay bibimbap cell phone charm, and a card with a panda on it from one of my old roommates in taiwan, karen (the nice twin). it suddenly occurred to me that she was so lovely to me the entire time i was her terrifying, partying, insomniac american roommate who didn't speak chinese to par and i wasn't nearly as nice back as i should have been. i never fully appreciated her efforts in taking me out to korean food the last night i was in taiwan, the taking to heart my love for bibimbap hence the choice of present, the willingness to look up times for gtv lineups for me and put up with my inane questions ranging from vocab to street locations and my being awake at 5 in the morning while she tried to sleep. i remember that there were slight traces of tears in her eyes when i left though we weren't by any means close. she still facebook messages me sometimes. there are probably dozens of people like her in my life who i don't see. i need to remember to send her something sweet in the mail.

4. one thing i didn't accomplish this summer which i still aspire to do: get at least one more ear piercing.

5. school: click here. (too lazy to copy/paste the entire thing.)

6. i cannot believe that once again, it is my last night in denver. insert obligatory how-i-will-miss-everybody-everything-i-hate-syracuse-classes-i-will-be-back-soon-and-i-will-make-changes-in-my-life-this-year post here, etc etc etc. despite the fab location of my apt and the closeness of my roommate and i, i have just never been that excited to leave home. call me a homebody or just oddly close to my parents and my family or way too comfortable in my denver niche or whatever, but denver is always home and will always be, and i hate going away. a large part of it is concern that my family will be sad after i am gone (this is in no means an effort to sound proud of or think largely of myself), so i am actually kind of glad that my cousin will be essentially replacing me for the next year: living in my room, eating with my family, filling up the space i leave open. despite my fussiness about people touching my stuff, i am glad she will be here so at least my mother will have somebody to talk to during the days she isn't at work.

i am entirely too lazy to make a whole post about leaving denver and starting a new school year, so let's not and pretend we did. however, i do want to say this:

i don't believe at all in the saying "once you leave home, you can never truly go back to it". instead, i would like to amend it to, at least in my own personal encounters: once you leave home, it will always be there waiting for you to step in and continue where you left off.

here's to november 19th when i pick up the threads again. :)

(also, i already miss summer time a lot. lazy days on the back deck swing, late nights at coffee, drinks downtown, parties and beer in boulder, flip flops, coffeehauses, sushi, spontaneous froyo, even work; i will see you 2011 may.)

mood_ meh, all right, all things considering
music_ silence
crave_ somebody to pack for me

Labels: contemplation, dreams, figuring things out, friends, good things, life, nostalgia, school, weekly sum-up