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G U N T H R O A T E D ;
summer. 23. chinese american. denver/new york/taipei. morning news producer. sometimes writer.
summer likes wine after all
Friday, April 30, 2010 @ 11:37:00 PM
no real reason for the picture today other than the fact that it looks delicious and healthy and i am craving it. ; ;
1. i'm doing great today! lmao i sound like an emotional slinky (slinky? see-saw? something weird and bipolar that keeps bouncing around.......) but really i'm mostly in this state of mind so now that i've somewhat bounced back to it it's nice to know and hopefully it'll stay that way for a while. i called daren a couple days ago after she noticed something was clearly wrong and ahh it was so good talking to one of my biffs after only saying a few things in passing over twitter and text and whatnot over the past couple months. she made me feel a lot better about the whole situation though i'm not sure i should be (lmao GOD I SOUND LIKE BROODY EDWARD CULLEN PUNISHING HIMSELF fuck my life), but i love that i have friends like her and i miss her :( :( and it was just so good talking to her!! i now feel a little more enlightened and happy. if i didn't have a more overwhelming desire to be with my family over the summer, i'd definitely live with her up at boulder. actually, still not decided on that yet... to take classes at d.u or c.u? hmm.
2. lol one of andrew's friends hit on me, i think? i'm still not sure if i'm being paranoid but everybody i talked to said he definitely was and it wasn't just me reading too much into it. anyway his name is micah oh and he reminds me a ton a TON of kush, so i think a lot of it was my fault because i may have gave him the wrong impression? because i projected a lot of my celebrity crush on kush onto him (loloops) so he might have gotten the wrong idea. anyway we were hanging out after andrew went to class - him on crutches after he busted his knee playing rugby, kush playing rugby! naturally - when he started saying things like "you know andrew doesn't consider this a real relationship right" and "don't you think you deserve so much more" and all that yada yada you're cheating yourself thing that EVERYBODY thinks here because NOBODY BELIEVES ME WHEN I SAY I AM HAPPY WITH WHAT IT IS. do i have to outright say I JUST AM IN IT FOR THE FUCKING? that's a lie but at least it would get people to leave me the fuck alone about my ~hidden emotions~ i have apparently not tapped into. albeit they'd probably label me a whore, but. sacrifices. anyway now it's kind of awkward and idk what to do, but he's a senior so i don't have to see him anymore after next friday so whatever worst comes to worst i'll just avoid him for 7 more days.
3. i really, really need to go shopping. i look at my closet every morning and just frown face. yea okay this is probably every girl, but everything just looks so recycled. i think i need to clean out my wardrobe again and re-stock. 8| i have such an itch to at least online shop (it's my cardio and therapy okkkkk) but i've spent way too much money this semester already so i'm trying to hold off until at least i get back for the summer. will update on that later........ somebody cut off access to forever21.com and urbanoutfitters.com in the meantime.
4. my filming today went so so so SO well. i don't even give a shit that i missed all of mayfest for it (well, except that i missed drake and n.e.r.d. in concert :\). everybody there was just so nice and so cooperative and let me film wherever i wanted however long i wanted and the interview with brandon the manager was great and there was even coincidentally a WINE TASTING and i got a little drunk because i kept tasting the different kinds, OOPS, prof park would kill me for drinking on the job, but WHATEVER EVERYBODY ELSE IN MY SCHOOL WAS GETTING SCHWASTED AT WALNUT PARK SO AT LEAST I GOT TO PARTAKE A LITTLE IN THE DEBAUCHERY 8). ykw, i'm not even actually sure the footage i got was a+...... which is a little worrying because in that case, i really should not be this satisfied about the whole experience...... also i feel horrible because brandon had printed out and given me this whole sheet of facts and even wrote some more facts down for me to take with, but i forgot it there T_______T i feel like a douchebag and i hope he knows it wasn't on purpose, but i have no way of going back there to get it. i might call him on monday just to ask him to repeat what he wrote so he doesn't think i'm an asshole. anyway, this was just the complete opposite of the unique teahouse shoot so i'm walking on sunshine, fuck you. also, speaking of the unique teahouse shoot, i redid the package for that on thursday and.... well idek how much better it is but i honestly worked until i could not think of a single way to make it any better with what i had, so...... cross fingers.
5. oh! so anyways, at this wine tasting where i did get a little drunk, (why am i putting this under a separate number... i go off on tangents way too much) i finally found a wine i don't detest! sonoma-cutrere, it's a white summer wine. it's not amazing and i wouldn't drink it just because, but i actually enjoy it, especially with cheese cubes, SO TOP, WE CAN PARTY NOW, RIGHT? I CAN HANG WITCHU? 8)
6. fangirly moment: gummy's album is gorgeous. gorgeousgorgeousgorgeous i literally got shivers and tears when i listened to let's break up. i think that one's my favorite off the album but i love because he's a man and loveless, too. oh gummy you have done so well. hj was adorbs in the bc he's a man music video. ALSO.
afjalfjalkfjalfjskfjlakfsaflajflkaf sobs. ;_______________; whyyyy is he so gorgGWHY ARE YOU SO PERFECT GDRAG WAEEEE. i wish there was a full body shot of him at this rick owen's grand opening party bc his outfit his OUTFIT fajlgkagal. the fitted leather zip-up turtleneck WHATEVER that made his torso look long and lean and then paired with the ultra saggy athletic pants slightly rolled up at the bottom does he KNOWWWW THIS IS MY PERFECT LIKE IDEAL SILHOUETTE WHEN I DRAW GUYS LIKE this is the outline i always draw boys in and daydream about somebody pulling off and then he goes and pulls it off OFC HE DOES OF COURSE and also, his gorgeous shoes and his fucking GAUGES IN HIS EARS THAT ARE SIMILAR TO MINE AND HAGLSGJLDamslgsd is he still wearing the promise ring? i don't even care that his hat is fucking weird afmalgakutotwlkjt marry me ;____; gorgeous gdrag my fabulous little man look at you all amazing ; ;
7. seven days until i'm home and now that i no longer dread it so much, there's just a ton of stuff for me to do, not even counting studying for finals, before i'm done. ignore all this, it's just for me.
- FINALIZE CREDIT TRANSFERRING: get j.nicholson's signatures, figure out where to go for culture course transfer
- sign up for classes either at d.u or c.u for summer,
- credit check @ newhouse again?
- PACK?
finals:
- pho205: final project due may 7
- bio123: may 7, 3-5 pm, watson theatre
oh it's 2:20 AM!!! HAPPY MAY!!!!!!!!!
mood_ drained T_T
music_ let's break up - gummy
crave_ something sweet and ice cold....... oh god i can still order brownies don't let me
Labels: alcohol, boys, fangirling, fashion, friends, g-dragon, likes, music, school, to-do list, weekly sum-up